From Fear to Fearlessness

 

One way to think of the ego is as a defense against pain, particularly the pain of being no one. It shores us up, reminding us that we are somebody…And yet, deep down we may sense that we are still seeking to plant a flag in ground that gives way under our feet.

Tracy Cochran, Parabola 2017

 

The journey from fear to fearlessness often passes through the land of grief.  We are naturally afraid of so many things that might cause us pain, disruption, loss. While it is prudent to take as good care of things as we can like our health, finances, relationships, all that we control is minuscule in relation to the great principle of change that is happening all around us.  Everything is always in a state of flux including our bodies, our feelings and emotions, our material circumstances.  

 

The ego part of consciousness is most threatened by change because the ego establishes a sense of self through the material world, what is owned, accumulated, achieved. When change appears on the horizon, the ego is threatened. This is the root source of our free-floating fear, the fear of groundlessness. We might try many things to numb, ignore, or suppress this fear but the only way to weaken its influence and to find freedom is to go deeper into it.      

 

This takes tremendous courage and practice because when the ego is threatened it can feel like an annihilation.  What is dying is the ego and our cherished illusion that we can control the things happening to us, that we are invulnerable.  If we allow ourselves to grieve the loss of control, the grief can soften our hearts and pave a way through the tender heart to a connection with innerself.  The innerself is not defined by the material world so feels more at home in groundlessness.  While our egoic part believes our worth comes from outside accomplishments and approval, the innermost self stands outside of judgement in awe of life’s moment to moment unfolding.

 

Because the ego defines itself through a hard and rigid form, anything that doesn’t adhere to this patter will feel like an unworkable obstacle. From the perspective of the more flowing innermost self, though, the obstacles themselves will appear more fluid.  Possibilities for growth, meaning, and purpose, will rise up to the surface of our knowing when we let go of the rigidity of egoic self. This is how we move from fear to fearlessness.