Chosen

 

We don’t choose life.  Life chooses us.

It can seem as if we are in charge, through the hundreds of choices we make each day, thousands over a lifetime, for what happens to us.  That through these choices we steer our lives in a certain direction.  If we make “good” choices our life go well.  If we make “bad” choices our lives don’t go so well.  Our culture and economy surely emphasize this with messages, urges, and admonishment to take control in order to make more money, become more beautiful, secure perfect and sustaining health and spirituality.  We see the catastrophes others face at the border, in the hurricanes, on the front lines but still strongly believe that by making the right choices, better ones, we can avoid disaster and be happy.

 If you take some time to consider what brought you to where you are now, however, you may realize that rather than choosing life, the life you are living has chosen you.  Some of the most significant things we do in life like having children, taking on a trade or educational pathway, setting out on a pilgrimage choose us rather than the opposite.   While we do make choices, they mostly don't result from a rational weighing of all the pros and cons as if we could know in advance what these were going to be. They arise from a deep inner pull that we may or may not be aware of or follow.   This is true for the hundreds of small choices and the many larger ones.  

The more we are aware of what pulls us or pushes us in certain directions the wiser our actions become. Rather than a knee-jerk pulling away from what scares us, we might find a way to feel that fear but realize that this is the direction we need to go in for healing, for growth, for purpose.  Instead of doing what seems easiest in the momentary short-run, we might discern instead to do the opposite, even if  painful, if it opens the door to deeper intimacy or compassion.  With this kind of wisdom comes a greater freedom to act in the world from a place of integrity and wholeness. 

 The way our life unfolds cannot be forced by ignoring the inner callings.  This is like paddling upstream against the current.  When we override an alignment with these deeper longings out of fear, shame, or confusion we become more afraid, depressed, and exhausted.  The choices available to us narrow.   When we can learn to discern what life is asking of us, we can use our energy more wisely to come into alignment with this purpose.