Indwelling

 

 

Without santosha (self-containment) is to build a form which has no indwelling life in it. 

Rohi Mehta, Yoga: The Art of Integration

 

Presence is the true refuge.

Tara Brach, True Refuge

 

Yoga reveals to us a rich depth of embodiment which we uncover layer by layer overtime through years of practice.  What may start as a physical experience penetrates the more subtle sheaths of existence emotional, intellectual, and spiritual as we cultivate more sensitive ways of perceiving ourselves.  This journey inward is like an outer journey in that the actual experience of it is unlike anything we could have imagined.  We have to embark on the journey to experience it.  The sense of fullness that comes from feeling the bones of the body, the space created from an opened chest, the calm of an inversion has to be felt to be understood.  Inside of that fullness we come in contact with the seer, our indwelling, which is the part of ourselves which has accompanied us our entire lives. 

 

I imagine the indweller as a flickering light from a window welcoming me home after a journey.  Sometimes, what I long for most is that quiet place of belonging and respite.  The hunger for this belonging can overtake hunger for outer things.  Presence brings depth and layers to all experience so when it is lacking things feel thin and less satisfying.

 

Indwelling feeds us in ways that the outer world alone cannot. When we are confused, we end up trying to get this energy through outer things or relationships or accomplishments which lack the unconditionality that only presence can provide.  These outer sources of energy are much too limited to nourish an expansive spiritual journey.