Wholeheartedness

 

Sutra III.53  Many people die without having lived. This is true cellularly as well as psychologically, by perfect positioning in asana, we flood our cells with life which is nothing but present awareness.  The cells too will die – but first they will have lived.

BKS Iyengar, Light on the Yoga Sutras

 

My deepest wish is to live as fully as possible before I die at the physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual levels.  To live fully is to discern what life is calling from me and to wholeheartedly embrace its pursuit with as much courage, energy, and faith as I can muster.  Discernment relies on a clear knowing of soul's calling untangled from familial expectations, stereotypes, biases, and other potentially damaging forms of social conditioning.  Engaging in the quest requires not shying away from what scares me, what I think I am incapable of, what I fear I will be ridiculed for trying.

 

Jungian Psychologist James Hollis has said that each morning we face the demon of lethargy or the demon of fear.  Lethargy tells us, “Do it tomorrow don’t bother yourself today,” while fear tells us, “You are incapable and something bad will happen if you try.” Both drain the life out of our living.  To break the cycle of lethargy and fear which can keep us from meeting our deepest callings in life, to more fully live before we die, we must find, cultivate, and renew a force of will and faith that is greater than these demons. By unlocking our powers of discernment and the flow of prana, asana can help us to do this.     

 

Asana gives us a way to cultivate discernment and the energy, courage, and faith to live wholeheartedly.  In asana, we open up the passages to the inner self cultivating our innate intelligence and power of discernment and releasing blocked energy.   In forward bend, I am not simply trying to touch my toes.  To create the actions of the asana, I bring my intelligence to the inner heel pressing into the floor, the outer edges of the hips lifting up, the waist elongating to the floor.  The opposite of distraction, I am with myself in an intimate concentrated way.  Where my awareness flows prana follows. Fresh blood is pressed into smaller and smaller spaces plumping up the cells feeding them with nutrients and energy.  Through asana my body becomes more known to me.  The body I live in the body that is me.  I move beyond habitual numbness into the sensations of life and the release of energy for life that resides in the body. 

 

Through asana, my intelligence (buddhi) becomes sharper.  I become aware of the ways my body is hijacked by the physical gripping and tension of anxiety, how I retract from places I am afraid to penetrate.  Where there is physical holding there is also emotional and spiritual holding and the demons will hold sway.  Through the exploration of asana I learn to release the physical and emotional holding and open up more space for spiritual growth the storehouse of energy for wholehearted discernment of my soul’s calling and fuller engagement with the world.